My Life in Atlantis — Chapter 1

Cover Illustration — Selfie in front of the Public Baths, made popular by later Romans.

Many of the things we associate with ancient Greece and ancient Rome actually were developed in Atlantis and introduced into various cultures by Atlanteans, who were literally everywhere around the planet, influencing virtually every human culture in the world.

It’s not that Atlanteans came in spaceships — they didn’t. They were originally a small group of stranded Inter-Dimensional Voyagers who landed on Earth with no way to get home, so they built and inter-bred and are here now, both incarnated and reincarnated, primarily in the Americas.

I have a long history of Atlantean Citizenship and was a Grand Elder of the High Council, as if you didn’t already guess. Women at that time and in that culture were generally part of government and many women like myself, coming from total poverty into wealth and power and on to spiritual matters, serving as a High Priestess of the Holy Writ, and Keeper of the Scrolls of Power.

Sounds totally awesome, right? But, hey, at the end of the day, a job is just a job, and high level spiritual matters are no exception.

Selfie at Mohenjo-Daro, an Atlantean settlement during the First Kingdom.

Lemme rummage around in my photo album to see what we have to look at. I’ve stored them sort of mish-mash, so they might be as much as 32,000 years apart from one to the next, sorry about that, Chief.

So, okay, I found the file, but I guess I should explain first about the photos. Of course I used a TimeGate to get back there with a cellphone — I actually have an Android, I can’t afford the other kind, the Apple thingy, you know.

So anyway, there’s this TimeGate in the back of our house right inside the Tea House. Oh, did I mention that we have a Zen Garden? Anyway, so there’s this TimeGate back there and it’s free, you don’t have to pay any monthly charges on it and you can use it all  you want, so why pay for the Golden Chariot or the Misty Mirror when you can get it for free?

It’s no biggie, nobody’s getting ripped, that’s been Open Source for like twenty years or more, so what the hey, why not?

18 Rabbit’s “Bowl O’ Red”  was an Over-the-Top  restaurant in Ancient Atlantis.

So anyway, as you can see from my selfies, my cellphone is obviously an Android, so if you don’t like Android snaps, I guess you’re out of luck, right? You can only take one thing with you through the TimeGate, so of course I took my cell, because if I can’t text and take selfies, what is my life, right?

Lawls. I know, right?

So anyway, I took my cell, which was my “one thing”, so when I got there, I made a beeline for my house to rummage my closet for something to wear, quick. So I did that, and here I am where I landed, which is one of my old haunts, I guess you’d say, and as a Time Voyager, I guess I qualify in the ghost department, so I’m okay with that, going forward.

The big ship in the harbor at Manos, a seaport on the mainland of Atlantis.

I was so stoked by the sight of that ship that I had to take a selfie of it, so here it is. Those striped sails are totally awesome, and they had just been in a battle where they rammed the enemy ships and sank them.

I never make bets on who can shoot the most swimmers with their arrows, however, I can be persuaded to make a small wager on which one gets smacked with an oar, which is another pastime of gallery slaves and their masters.

It’s all in good fun, by ancient standards, and nature is no kinder, but anyway, we have our kind of fun in Ancient Atlantis, and when I travel back there, about once a week, I am sure it is going to be a fun time.

I love the bullfights and the bull-leaping, but they are very different sports, like the difference between auto racing and horse racing. We have chariot races back there, and dog races, cockfighting, boxing, wrestling, free-for-all, last-man-standing and so many more sports where you can bet on the winner, which in this case means “survivor”.

That used to be the whole point of ancient sports and games of chance — you bet on the survivor — the survivor was the winner. You can bet that cost me a lot of livestock, but it’s all in good fun.

Horus was an Atlantean God before he appeared in ancient Egypt.

I suppose I’ll get bashed and beaten for that remark, but it WAS in fun. When the birth rate is low and the infant mortality rate is high, and nobody has enough food, there is no shelter and life is cheap, death is the only thing left to laugh at.

So anyway, I was about to tell you about the falcons, those two Horus statues in back of me in the selfie I posted above, okay, right? But would you believe, those birds are real. I mean, they talk, they notice you, they do more than talk, they converse, and these are not some concoction I drank at the party last night, nor are these the product of the workshop of Heron of Alexandria.

These birds are real, like I said, and they talk. It cost me a Drachma in tips to get someone to take this instead of a selfie so I could pose for it. My smile is so weird, don’t you think? I don’t know what it is, maybe it’s that new “Gentle Dental” sponge based toothpaste that I started using to help me break the chewing gum habit that I formed when I quit smoking.

I never should have started smoking in the first place, but when I was a teenager, all my friends were doing it to show how cool they were. Of course, we had tobacco from our own plantations, along with all the other weeds and herbs you’d find in nature. We cultivated all of them, especially hemp and bamboo, the two most useful plants in the entire plant kingdom, and I can prove it with a list of products that can be made from each of them.

OMG I can’t believe I still have this snapper in my docs file.

At the same moment that I snapped this selfie, the palace was being stormed. I’m upstairs, so I’m quite safe for the moment, and I’ll step through the Portal and be out of there before the raiding party can get all the way up here, which obviously I must have done or this would never have been posted.

I went from the palace at Babylon, which is where I’m at in the snapper above, right to our summer home on the Island of Albion, which is present-day England.

It may be hard to believe, but Atlantis colonized virtually every continent, every country, every land and waterway, long before the Second Great Flood, the one that carried Noah and the Ark to Mount Ararat, where the Ark resides yet today, under the ice.

There was a LOT more ice back in the day, and sea-level was a LOT lower, so our cities and harbors have long since vanished under the waves, and to top that off, some of our islands also disappeared under mysterious circumstances, such as earthquakes and volcanoes. Planet Earth is very active, still quite hot at the radioactive core, and volcanic activity and tectonic movement are still very much a part of the science and history of today.

Selfie at the Higgs Field Distortion Matrix, ready to Time Travel back to Atlantis.

I love going home to Atlantis, it’s my favorite spot for just about everything from dining out and village dancing to going on a hunt or with a war party against the Amazons or wiping out thousands of runamuck Dingos. Sure we were in Australia.

Look at it this way: if your 2,000 year old civilization can discover exo-planets and the God Particle and make robots that look and sound like people, what makes you think that a civilization that is more than a million years old hasn’t done the same, many hundreds of thousands of years ago, and gone further than you could ever dream of in your timebound limited fashion.

I’m not making fun. It’s not your fault that you’re not telepathic. But it IS your fault that you still have upsets, get into fights and argue over nothing.

Naturally, somebody just hadda wisecrack what a nice ass I have, so I razzed ’em.

I know it seems really weird to suddenly show up with a burro, right? But it makes sense, because I was in the South-Western rim of the Galaxy at the time, looking through some long-lost documents in the Kam-Zham Region of the Overlords Sector, which I guess you’d call the “Akashic Records”, but it goes by lot of different names, depending on the culture or lack of it in which the concept is spoken aloud.

Written language is so different from spoken language, don’t you agree? And you really can’t know if what you said was understood by another even if you supposedly speak the same language.

I mean, how do I know that when you and I look at what I’m trained to call “the color blue”, you see the same thing I’m seeing? What if you’re seeing what I call “orange” when I’m seeing the same color, but I’m seeing what I call “blue”?

Or what if you’re not seeing it at all, but you’re saying you do just to chill me out?

I hate when people try to calm me, comfort me, sooth me, with obvious truths. Why can’t they leave me to my delusions, illusions and confusions? But no, they have to dip in and make their point, which is why I ended up taking the High Road, which is the same thing as saying, I jumped into a Time-Bender, and here I am to tell the tale.